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hello this is al, your local goth. or so i used to be. nowadays you can find me between stoners, metalheads and a few internet friends like a generic troll. which i might not even be, but what am i anyway?
i would call myself an edgelord, if i had to pick a word. i enjoy everything edgy, beyond the soft emo sadness. give me the gruff shit.
i used to think i need to create a big work of art to bring value to myself but lately ive just been vibing and existing. i came here because im sick of posting art on instagram and comparing myself to 50 artists a day who are ten years younger than me and whose art looks much cleaner and so perfect- i come from earlier deviantart times when you had 20 followers instead of 600, scribbling stuff on your school notes and sharing things with your three best friends only. the internet is too big a place for me.
here's to me sharing what i do for the few people who actually care. i could send things to them directly, but i miss messing around with html, creating gifs for your page and posting song lyrics that no one will look at or understand. we did it because we wanted to do it, and thats what ill be doing here.
the page contains drawn things, written things, created characters and other random projects.
a lot of what i write sounds like romanticising the things we shouldnt, i just find beauty and humour in pretty much every situation and have a strange addiction to feeling depressed. maybe that is the definition of romanticising, i dont know. but from my perspective, i grasp things, analyse them, feel them and put them back into words. in a nihilistic kind of way, sadness makes me feel calm. content even. it feels like finally the world is alright and i am exactly where i was meant to be. so i hope to transfer this feeling through my writing and set your soul to ease.

as you would expect from the words above, the things i do will include themes of mental problems, drug use, possibly offensive takes, loud music and lyrics that have my mother worried about me. we chill tho. listen to a lot of genesis together.

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status:
everything still under construction.
chapter one of traces of a pushpin is already on here but only a fourth has been edited and corrected so far.